Its a lot of reasons lost.One is the hurt child that couldn't voice her pain when she was first abused. A lot of chid abuse victims have this and that self hatred just gets worse as more abuse happens.Your therapist should be able to teach you how to bring her out an make the pain go away or at least understand that thats where a.lot of the hate comes from.

You probably hate yourself because you feel you deserve it but you don't. You are not the one responsible, you are the victim here especially when you were a child. The sooner you realize this, the sooner you can start to take back your life.

You are never responsibly, it was not your fault and you should not feel guilty, try making a memory jar of all the good things that have happened in your life.

You are never responsibly, it was not your fault and you should not feel guilty, try making a memory jar of all the good things that have happened in your life.

it is not your fault. but it is very common to feel this way. and it is one very difficult part of healing to get beyond. I don't know the reasons why this happens but it does. and i think it is very important to help the little girl that didn't understand and was made to believe it was her fault, to heal. I think these feelings are the hold over from the childs mentality at the timen and the conditioning as a result of the abuse.

I spent half a life time not liking myself until i realized that this was only holding me back from healing. One of my first commemnts to myself,once i commetted to healing was to allow myself to love myself and realize that it was not my fault.

good luck and stay strong.

You need to feel respected as a person. Don't judge yourself. Know that you can decide to think differently. There is no reason to hate yourself, and you didn't betray yourself. Love yourself. What would you tell your friend?

Everyone says it's not our fault, yet we all feel like it is. I know it's hard to get past that feeling and I don't know how to tell you to do so, but I can tell you that I feel the same way.

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I think abuse victims feel this way because they think they should have done something more to stop the abuse. Told, fought back harder etc. This is simply not the case and yet I think the vast majority feel the same as you. I agree with Vanda. Talk to your counselor about this. Once you accept that you did what you had to do to survive and not be beaten or killed then you can move on.

hi, can i say that you are no way responsible for it happening to you, please believe me, i am 40 now and i still hate myself, people say i should love myself, but i cannot even of this day, but again you not the one responsible..stay safe please

Baby-Doll, don't hate yourself...don't feel guilty! YOU DID NOTHING WORNG! You are am innocent victim! The PERP. made EVIL choices and He/She is to BLAME.
You are strong, brave, and to be BELIEVED!

I don't know why. All I can say is that I feel exactly the same way. And rational thought can't fix it. EMDR and psychodynamic therapy are helping me, but I have a lot to work through. I"m so sorry for what you have been through, and it is NOT YOUR FAULT. Keep listening when people tell you that, and keep telling it to yourself...over and over and over again!

We all have the responsibility of loving and caring for ourselves where others we depend on are not able to provide that love and care we sometimes need. We feel angry when we disappoint ourselves which leads to taking on more and more responsibilities that don't even belong to us. You need to start loving and caring for yourself better by putting yourself in the victims shoes and getting all the help you need.

Repeat after me, 'It was not my fault. I did nothing wrong. I am a good person.'

I'm so sorry you are feeling this way. However, if you stress this to your therapist, the both of you can work on it. I'm not saying it's easy but, in the end, it's far worth it.

You deserve to be the person you can be.

I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

love and peace ... Kyle Anne

lostandafraid,

Self hate is so common for survivors of abuse! We learn to little to no self respect, self worth or self esteem and without that we also learn to hate ourselves.

When people hurt us and manipulate us we learn to hate ourselves later in life for allowing it..the key is we were children when our abuse began and we were not capable of protecting ourselves from these abusers. As for later in life what happened to you, unfortunately any of us can be the victim of a crime..because of your earlier abuse that only magnifies what you already survived.

You can get past this darkness within yourself and learn to respect and love yourself again.

EMDR therapy is a wonderful therapy that helps so much to get past what was done to you and with it therapist that are trained in this type of therapy usually teach you coping skills and techniques to rebuild your self esteem and self worth.

I will assure you recovery is so worth it..it is not the easiest road to take but at the end of it you can be..happy and live life!! Huge hugs to you and I am here to support and encourage you when you need it!!

With love!