Sexual Abuse Support Group

Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...

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Was it rape or not?

deleted_user
deleted_user
I dated a guy for many months in high school. We were in love. We had been intimate many times but had always used protection. One night, he asked if we could go without promising to stop as soon as I wanted him to. I agreed, however when I asked him to stop he didn't. I had one person (someone that was a habitual liar and wanted sex) tell me that what he did was rape. I had another tell me that it was love and over-consuming passion. He had never hurt me and never intended to. I just wish I could finally figure out what it was that happened between us so that I could move on and deal with the actual assults that I know were assults/rape. Thanks for any insight.
deleted_user
deleted_user
You changed your mind and that is your right. No means no. I don't know if it is classified as rape or not, I am not a lawyer, but i think at the very least it would be sexual assault.

good luck
deleted_user
deleted_user
Man, that is tough. A stop sign means stop though, not slow down or coast on though. I understand you had/ have feelings for the guy and betrayal of trust in the least. Call it what it is.
Shai
Shai
in my opinion it is rape. if he HONESTLY loved you, he would've stopped. no doubt about it.
deleted_user
deleted_user
As soon as one of you says stop or no, then the other person should comply and respect that. If they continue even though you have asked it to stop it is considered that the sex is no longer consensual and therefore classed as rape. In your situation it is classed as date rapte
deleted_user
deleted_user
I guess the bigger question is...how do you Feel about it ??...I mean did it make you Feel like something had been Taken from you??...like your trust ??....your power ??...do you feel fear at the thought of being alone with him again ??

I have had it happen...someone when I was much younger did not stop when i wanted him to...and then after he drove me around til I had calmed down...I could never look at his face again...ever.
deleted_user
deleted_user
when it first happened I thought nothing of it. I didn't think about it until someone was telling me that it was rape. I'm best friends with the old boyfriend and we have discussed the incident to length. I feel safe around him. I'm probably nuts for being that way but he was always good for me then and has been a life saver literally recently. By definition it was rape, but by talking to him it is being resolved. Thanks all for the advice.
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