Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
This question runs through my head on a daily basis. As a freshman in high school I was at a bonfire with my friends. They were older than me and into drinking and drugs, so predictably I accepted the alcohol they had given me. They also gave me adderal and stupidly I took it. Soon enough I was completely wasted. I couldn't move. My "friend," I'll call him Daniel, was 18. Daniel was sober. Besides the fact that he was 18 and I was fourteen considers it "stagitory rape," I want to know if I can call this insident rape or if it was my fault. I specifically remember telling him it was okay, but in my heart it wasn't. I never would have had sex with him sober, however I did give him consent thefore making it consensual. He had to carry me to his car because I couldn't walk. I have had nightmares ever since of being in a huge crowd at my old high school and the only person who I could see was Daniel with a single red rose in his hand. Was this rape or was this my fault?
Aside from this, I believe was a victim of sexual abuse as a child. I know that "playing doctor" and just being curious is just how children are. This, however, was taken too far. As a preschooler I was napping with the rest of the kids when a yellow blanket was thrown over my head. Another preschooler (which is why I do not know if this was abuse or not because we were both so young) had tried to sufficate me and was touching me. I was trying to fight back but he was much larger than me. I remember being really uncomfortable and terrified to go back to preschool.
On another occasion when I was in first or second grade a boy would sit with me on the bus. Again, he was my age. He would push me and punch me if I did not allow him to touch me and kiss me. He would stick his hands down my pants and try to make out with me. I was afraid to tell my mom because I thought that she would be mad so I let this boy continue to do this for the remainder of the year.
Today I am very depressed and I have been cutting myself for four years now. I am seventeen now. I have very low self-esteem and do not respect myself or my body. I believe that some of these events have made me the person I am today. I know that the events that happened when I was little may not be a huge deal but the event with Daniel really effects me, not knowing if it was rape or consensual.
Can anyone help me? Have I been raped and sexually abused as a child?
Aside from this, I believe was a victim of sexual abuse as a child. I know that "playing doctor" and just being curious is just how children are. This, however, was taken too far. As a preschooler I was napping with the rest of the kids when a yellow blanket was thrown over my head. Another preschooler (which is why I do not know if this was abuse or not because we were both so young) had tried to sufficate me and was touching me. I was trying to fight back but he was much larger than me. I remember being really uncomfortable and terrified to go back to preschool.
On another occasion when I was in first or second grade a boy would sit with me on the bus. Again, he was my age. He would push me and punch me if I did not allow him to touch me and kiss me. He would stick his hands down my pants and try to make out with me. I was afraid to tell my mom because I thought that she would be mad so I let this boy continue to do this for the remainder of the year.
Today I am very depressed and I have been cutting myself for four years now. I am seventeen now. I have very low self-esteem and do not respect myself or my body. I believe that some of these events have made me the person I am today. I know that the events that happened when I was little may not be a huge deal but the event with Daniel really effects me, not knowing if it was rape or consensual.
Can anyone help me? Have I been raped and sexually abused as a child?
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
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Has anyone tried these supplements? Do they give MGers more quality of life by improving memory and overall well being?Thanks!Barbel
What I can say is that you should take it as a learning experience and NEVER put yourself in that situation. I think you're more mad at yourself then you are at him, just simply because you knew in your heart of hearts that you didn't really want to do it, but you never said no. Rape means that you say no and they continue anyway. Rape in the true sense of the word means that you struggle if able, and you say no and they continue. Not that you willed the word no in your mind. Afterall we can't expect anyone to read our minds. For all you know if you had said no he would have stopped. You did say he was your "friend".. And I might pose another question. Have you ever talked to Daniel about this?
Just things to think about. Now I know I'll have lots of opposition on this post, but let me say please don't send hate messages to me. I already know in advance you will guys aren't going to agree with this comment. It's just my opinion.
i am seeing a therapist, theres a lot behind the way that i act sexually and has to do with family issues but thats an entire different story. i know i am way to young and the things that i have done and experienced bothers me a lot. i dont have much self respect and i suppose that having a guy "want me" makes me feel better temperarily. i am not one of those "girls who cried rape" which is why i am questioning it, and always have. Nobody else that i have been with, wether i regret it or not, i have never considered "rape." What happened with Daniel just wasnt right. I shouldnt have to think about it everyday wether it was my fault or not. Yes he was my friend but definitely had the wrong intentions with me. What senior boy just wants friendship with a freshman girl? I remember a couple days before the situation happened he gave me a ride home and told me specifically that he would take atvantage of me if the situation was right. That should have been a red flag but i didnt listen and now i have to live with it. But i appreciate everyone's imput it definitely helps.