Can I ask everyone ??? If you saw a child walking down the street and some one attacks her sexualy, would you say it was her fault... If a child you heard about say a neighbours child gets sexualy attacked by a friend of the family or a family member would you say she or he deserved it ???????? We look and think of other children and people with such compassion and say its not thier fault... BUT WHY OH WHY DO WE BLAME AND SAY ABOUT OURSELVES THAT WE ARE TO BLAME AND ITS OUR FAULT... ??? How can we see that some one else is not to blame and that they should have no shame , that it is deffinatley not their fault... But in the same breath say of ourselves that its our fault that we must have done something to deserve it or we have done something wrong mmmm ???? OH WHY OH WHY OH WHY DO WE DO THIS TO OUR SELVES ???? When all I can see is perpetrators taking advantage of inosent children that have no power or have no strength to fight off a monster, then how I ask is it our fault, I know i have repeated myself but when are you , me , we, going to stop blaming ourselves, when are we going to realise that it is not us who should be ashamed, we have not done anything to be ashamed of, the doing has been done to us !!!!!!!! I'm not meaning to hurt anyones feelings but this has to be said and like you we all don't have to agree with what I write its ok to dissagree, please this is not a personal attack and yes I thought the same some time ago... But I have nothing or have done nothing to be ashamed of just like you all !!!!! xxxoooxxx luv lesley

I think the guilt we carry is a result of feeling we failed ourselves in someway, what happens to us makes us feel different or isolated. and if we feel this way we mush have done something wrong. The guilt is an extension of the phycial abuse. it is kind of the attarkers ultumate damage.