Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
I was raped by my brother as a child and I was confused because I got an erection and made myself believe that I liked it. I have had many confused feelings about my sexuality. I like the thought of having sex with other family members because of what happened. I have grown attracted to older men and it makes me feel disgusting. I am feeling like I am gay and I am in a deep relationship with a girl. We have been dating for 3 years. I told her about all of the feelings that I have. I don't feel comfortable having sex at all now. And we are both feeling depressed. I don't know what to do. I am trying to stay sober and all of these overwhelming thoughts are dragging me down. Someone help!
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
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My ENT sent me for more tests last week...one where they had me lie back in a chair, with blacked out goggles on so I couldn't see while they administered water into my ears one at a time ( first warm, then room-tempurature, then cold) while they video taped my eyes and asked me questions to determine how cognizant I was... This test went HORRIBLY. They were about 20 seconds or so into...
The body is made to respond to touch so just because your body responded doesn't mean you liked it emotionally. You were a child and did not know it was wrong and even if you did you didn't know how to stop it. When violated by a family member is confuses you more because you don't expect someone that cares about you to harm you.
This also does not mean you are gay. Your mind has processed the events with much confusion. Because your body responded you think you enjoyed it and maybe you did physically. That is common and that is why we have guilt of our own prior to healing.
I would suggest that you stay sober and find a good therapist to start healing what happened to you!
It is a huge step to take but you have to do it if you really want to know who you are and heal yourself from having all of these confusing thougts.
With love!