Hi Jo. I just joined this support group. I'm struggling too with finding a way to have a sexual relationship. I know that there will be a way for us to move on. I've had little glimmers of hope with my boyfriend. For me the opening up and trusting comes and goes. Right now it's not available to me. I really don't want to be touched or made to feel pleasure. It's soooo frustrating because I felt like I was making progress last month, but we pushed things too far which just backfired.
I know one thing. You have to give yourself lots and lots of patience and work really slowly. Give yourself as much time and love as you need. When you do get to a point of trusting someone it will feel good so don't force it.
Wow! in saying these things to you, I'm realizing that I need to take my own advice. Thank you for your post. Your questions reflected those troubling my soul today.

JFeather and gennabeth, You can move on and eventually have a wonderful relationship with someone and be intimate with that person. You first have to take the steps to heal yourselves.

You need to learn to trust, to love, you need to regain your self esteem and confidence and you can.

I would suggest finding a therapist to help you do so if your not already in therapist.

I am here if you need to talk!!

Genna you see you do have the answers to heal yourself and you didn't know it until you reached out to help someone else. That is why this site is so good, so many realize as they step up to help others that they do have the strength and knowledge with in to survive and heal!!

With love!!

hi

um some peobeple think that me being lesbian has a connection to not being able to trust guys coz of my cousin...but relationships are hard but you just need to find someone you can trust i mean i trust my GF with all that i am. x

There is hope. I survived several traumas growing up, basically my life was hell. I am now married to a wonderful man I love, been married twenty years. My sex life is sometimes good, sometimes, especially when I am really dealing with memories, just plain stinks. Trust progressed very slowly and we definitely had our issues, but love is possible. It might take longer to establish trust. Not that it's easy, but let the sexual side go for awhile and just focus on friendship.

I used to be and still am at times very cynical and always think that someone has an alterior motive for doing something for me...I am in therapy and have been for some time. If you can,find a good therapist. God bless.