pain. a fimiliar place. we have to learn to cope with the pain. have faith.

I hate to talk about it too. My counselor says its probably because I still havent totally dealt with it. DAMN! I used to talk about it think about it read about it try to understand I just got exhausted so I am trying to let myself be okay with what is working... sometimes i can face it and talk about it other times i just need to walk away... I dunno yet if its working. Time will tell.

i had to do the ssame in my psycology class, i have taken 4 different psyc classes and they are all for children. my last psyc class that i have finished *im in a new one now* it was childhood abnormalitis we where on the topic on abuse for a week and a half

Whether you've dealt or not, that can happen. It's been well over 30 years since mine ended but I have incredible empathy towards kids and I'll feel the same way you do. It is sad, it does "remind" us and personally, I don't think that will ever go away. But what's wrong with feeling empathy? The problem would be if you HAVEN'T dealt with your own abuse, then I would say do that first.

forgot to mention in class but it wasnt whne it was about abuse it was about down syndrom we watched a movie when they where being treated different *i work with specail needs and i also have a special need* i started to cry and i had all the students in my class looking at me. the people that i had in all my classes from my ece program new i was like that and the only guy in my class said huh oh when the movie fist started.

I call that amazing empathy and again, I see that as a positive.

It is a form of trauma. In this case there is a trigger that initiates the mind into facing what it is that you do not want to face. Your class is an example. Other triggers could be if you walked into a house that just so happened to have the same decoration of the place where the abuse took place even if it is a different location. There could be many things you have yet to discover such as scents or sounds and perhaps certain songs.

When it comes down to it if you want to understand what is happening logically your mind is attempting to heal itself. Just like the body can shut out pain from a gunshot wound even if it means you go unconscious then your body will force you to pass out if the pain would be too great to deal with. The mind holds a similar mechanism hence why some people have a difficult time remembering past painful events. The difference between mind and body is that the body has a healing process that is immediate. The minds healing process can be forced to be put on hold for many years. Eventually it will do one of two things, make you go crazy trying to avoid it or you slowly allow for things to come out and you accept them for what they are.

The past does not control us. Pain is only temporary. We are not held down by anothers hands but only by what our mind perceives. Release fear and you release pain thereby setting yourself into a state of mind that you can accept what was as it is then allow yourself to forgive and move on with life.

certain smells
certain phrases being said

those are things that trigger me off

I know exactly how you feel. I took just regular Psychology and then Human Growth and those was SO hard. My advisor will not let me sign up for Abnormal Psychology yet. She does not feel I am ready for it yet. I was lucky to have a teacher (had the same teacher for both...I just love her) who understood that I could not deal with certain topics. I spoke to her in her office in private. You could try talking to your teacher one on one. But, then the topics I missed were hard because they were on the tests. Good Luck...I know I didn't help much, but just wanted you to know I understood.