Sexual Abuse Support Group

Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...

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I don't know how to confront the issue...

deleted_user
deleted_user
I say I was abused as a child. I say this because it was something that happened to me(female) by my sibling(female) I confronted her about it the next day after the second time it happened and it didnt happen again. I'm now in my 20s and then was in the single digits. I've enver brought it up to anyone since then. I'm searching for answers and closure, I have serious trust issues in relationships, and perverted abusive hetero fantasies,I feel, because of this. I've subjected myself to a rape fantasy, and rough & hurtful sex. I like it not bc it feels good, but because its what I feel should be. I know this is wrong considering my history. I've led a promiscuous past luckily without any lasting effects besides mental. I have the best of men at my door, but cannot give any a fair chance at love which I so badly want to experience. I told one ex before without details and he then dismissed it and wanted to have unportected sex, something I am against. I don't know what to do, I feel better by expressing this, as its the first time I've done so, but would like advice on how to get over the abuse of a close family member whom I am still close with and I remember the instance, but I feel she does not or rather beleives it didn not happen in order for us to stick together as family. It happened at a time I was young and exploring myself as a child, she saw that and showed me how to let others help explore you as well, I feel like I invited something to happen and couldnt get out of it though I wanted it to stop. What hould I do?
deleted_user
deleted_user
I'd urge you to let go of the guilt that you feel for "inviting" something to happen....touching yourself is normal. Someone walking in on that is by no means an invitation to that person to join in. Touching yourself and being touched are two different things here. Please recognize that. You were subjected to inappropriate sexual touch by your sister that has left you with the effects of sexual abuse.

This is the time to tend to you. Consider therapy and working through the memory and the hold it has on you. Right now therapy is my lifeline to healing.

I'd also recommend reading on the subject. I always feel empowered reading about a subject that involves me...the knowledge that I'm not alone is very powerful to me...or even the understanding of this process helps me. I'm currently reading "The Courage to Heal" and "I never told anyone". Great reads.

(hugs)
deleted_user
deleted_user
I wasn't masturbating, I was reading an informative book on sex I found in my parents room, she looked at it with me then said lay down I'll show you something and proceeded to perform oral sex on me. The next week she improperly touched me while I seemed to be asleep and I froze unsure of what to do or what to say.

I let it happen.

Those were the worst feelings and I was tearing up but not crying, I've never told this to anyone but the anonymity of this site and openness allows me to be able to feel free to express myself. I'm not sure what to do now as I am 23 and looking to take up a potential husband on his offer of marriage, family & love. I have to trust and am unable to fully do so without sabotaging relationships and creating baggage.I also cannot achieve climax in sex bc something in my mind says I can't let go. If I enjoy it the least bit I feel bad about that. or half way through I end up crying because I'm remembering my situation and I get confused if hetero sex is okay and should be happening. It's a world of hurt & confusion.
deleted_user
deleted_user
You were taken advantage of...as a child you dont know what you want sexually as you are not developed enough mentally to be a healthy sexual being. Im afraid sometimes of the thoughts in my head too, I feel abnormal or perverted, but I realize that it is an after affect of what happened to me. What you need to do is seek therapy and listen to yourself. If you think that something is right for you, then you should do what your heart tells you. But if you ever feel uneasy or unsure about something, do not feel guilty saying no or finding another option. It takes time to heal and in order to do that you must face what you fear.
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