My mothers best friends were my abusers mother and aunt. The aunt is my god mother, well... was my God mother. But... i dont blame them for "dis owning" us. If it were my twelve yr. old, i would probably do the same thing. 12 is young. Children at such a young age are still able to be saved. With the proper treatment, and strength to want to get help, i believe he could have turned out to be a normal person... with a twisted past. But he turned out to be a loser. He is a drug user and his life is in shambles. But this is how i see it and some of you might too. His mother could not do anything while she was alive,( she passed away a few yrs. ago) but itsnt weird that her grandaughter and i are becoming best friends. Isnt it weird how im getting back in with the family, minus him. It just seems to me that she is getting everything back to how it was supposed to be. How it should have been seventeen years ago. Maybe its not... but it makes me feel better thinking that. While it is nice to be around everyone again, it is hard. Memories are starting to come back... all good, but its sad to know how much they cared about me then, and wonder if deep down inside they do now? Everyone says that at 2 you cant remember anything, but i can remember a lot. And even though my memory allows me to know that such a horrible thing happened to me, i appreciate that i have it because it also let me remember that at one point in time those i was their life. I believe things will get better. Its not going to be easy, but i have the strength to pull through. I CAN DO IT! And thank you so much to everyone for voicing your opinions. It means a whole lot to me. Its nice to know that people care... even if you dont know them! I had a thought the other day and i think it would be great if someday an orginazation was started for people like us. I know ther are small ones out there but something big like " make a wish", or " big brothers and big sisters" Even if it wouls just be a walk like the "relay for life". We need something like that to know that we are not alone and there are other survivors out there who feel the same as us!