Truthful I am still dealing with my pat abuse. I found a great therapist but that took sometime. I went through three before finding the right one. She told me when you feel like crying cry. I thought this was werid but it works. I also jounal on here. It hurts but it helps get it out. (HUGS) Good luck!

Write stuff down, and you will be able to see how far you've got. Time really is a healer, and you'll have good and bad days. I'm not a great example of someone who's actively gone after help, as the two counsellors I saw were crap. That's the UK for you! My way of dealing with my feelings was to remind myself regularly that I was NOT to blame, I am pure, I am better than he ever was, and I will not let him ruin my life. This community has been fantstic for helping me when I recently hit a bad patch.
Sorry I couldn't be of more help, but know that you will get through this.

Therapy should be your first step. It helps everyone, no matter how new you are, or experienced. Writing helps, as does simply relaxing wherever you feel safe. But remember, you've begun on a journey that takes awhile. It is long, repetetive, and diffucult, but always remember that there are people who love and support you. Hope this helps!

Writing, positive reinforcement...which is constantly brought up in therapy. Therapy...I guess.

I deal with my abuse all the time...and I mean more on an emotional level. Only one of my cases was ever brought to my parents attention early on. The ones after...not until recently. I've been lost for years.

Abuse is abuse, regardless of whether it's rape and you have healing to do. Try to find a good counselor that can talk you through your feelings of anger and resentment and can help you heal. I know it's painful, been there. XOXO

Honey,
You were given a life sentence.Thats what I feel about myself.You are not to blame,the shame is his not yours.I wish I could say that there will be a day when you are able to think about your abuse and not feel the same pain over and over again.I am 42 yrs old and 2 yrs ago I dealt with it.It split my family up for a while who believed me and who believed my brother etc.
I have learned to cope with it by joining sites like this.I even started an abuse site on myspace.Check it out www.myspace.com/myamazingjourney
I went to a place called s.a.f.e I went to group therapy,just hearing that others have the same feelings and hang ups that I do helped me a lot.Just knowing that I was not the crazy one,that I didnt ask for it or deserve it.Im reading a book now and it says to commit the same amount of time healing as you spent hiding.I hope it doesnt take me 30 yrs to heal.Everyday gets a little easier.BUT I also relied on God a lot. I can only do things in small steps.
My advice?
Take baby steps and walk with your head up high.You are strong,the weak could not endure what you have.
Take care and God Bless you
Im here if you need an ear.
Kathie
p.s Hope this helps you!

I had told my mom about my abuse some time after it happened. And then when I went to have my daughter and he was in my home I asked her what the F" waas he doing there. She asked me why was I so upset about him saying somethings to me. I said no B" he did some things to me. Now when I am sad she is sad. I never know how I am going to feel from day to day. But I try to use each day positively When I am mad I use that anger to focus on getting more done. And when I am happy I use that to want to do it, LOL!