Sexual Abuse Support Group

Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...

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Confronting my Mother

Susan842
Susan842
I have been talking to my therapist and we are working on confronting my mom about not protecting me as a child and basically overlooking her dad (my grandpa) molesting me for over 12 years. I am very angry about it, especially having a daughter of my own and not understanding why the hell she would allow this to happen..for I would kill someone if they touched my daugher.

So, have any of you confronted the ones who should have protected you. I am more angry at my mom than my grandpa and have nightmares of him pulling me away and my family doing nothing but watching it happen. How did you confront them and what happened? Did it help you recover? Is it worth it? Any and all advice would help me.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I wish you the best. My story is way too similar to yours. In short it was my father who abused/used and molested me for 13 years. My mother stood by and allowed it. When I confronted her at verious ages she denied it and stood by her man.

IT SUCKS and it hurts...
You are right about having your little girl and killing to protect her as I have two children and have grown angrier and angrier as they grew past all the ages I was.

I hope your story ends better then mine did as I refuse to speak to my mother or my molesting father ever again.

Please take care of yourself and your child first. Be prepared for anything to happen after telling your mother. Remember it was NOT your fault you were a child and it was the adults in your life that were supposed to keep you safe.

I hope your mom says what you need to hear. If you need to talk I am here.

Best of Luck
deleted_user
deleted_user
I have confronted my mom and for a long time she was in denial but has finally come around. It started with her saying something in denial how she wasn't there for us kids because she had to work. That didn't sit to well with me and I let her have it. My sisters had to pull me in the other room to calm me down. I'm not usually the confrontational type but I had finally heard enough excuses from her. We have had alot of talks since and we are very open with each other now. She now owns wht she has or hasn't done so it was worth it for me. Everyone is different though and I can't say how it will work for you I hope you and your mom can grow closer as I have with mine but their are no certainties in life. It has taken a few yrs. for us to get this far. The first time I confronted her I was 20yrs. old.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I was abused by my grandfather, uncle, and brother and while my mom got us away from 2 she made us continue to live with my brother as she "couldn't choose between her children" he is now in jail for rape of a 12 yr. old and may have gotten help and saved that child if she had done something. I tried to confront her but she is mentally ill and says she has always protected us and never hurt us. Of course she had no answer as to why I was in so many foster homes. I can't say that it will help and worry it will only make it worse but you never know. Maybe she has wanted you to confront her and has always felt guilty and will apologize. Just could go either way I'm afraid. Wish there was a better answer.
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