I am trying not to beat myself up but its hard, but I am trying. On the upside, I got a job today and one that I want to work - so the utilities wont be shut off. I am borrowing money from friends to pay them so they aren't over due and then with my first check pay them all back. So things are not as bad as they seem and I finally get that I don't need my ex. I did this all on my own and will continue to do this on my own with the support that I find through my family, treatment team and here. And slowly but surely I will meet and make new healthy friends for myself and not toxic ones like the ones I had when I was dating my ex. Thank you all for your support - I would not have made it this far without you. If you ever need a friend to vent to, I am here for all of you!
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