
Self-Injury Support Group
Whether you or someone you know or love struggles with self-injury, this is the community to discuss your experience, find support, meet others going through the same, and get advice on how to stop. Working together, we can help find alternative coping skills to reduce the urge to self-harm.

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I have to put my kids to bed so I am going to write this first and then hopefully come back to soem words of wisdom:)
I am trying to be open with my hubby about the cutting, trying to talk to him, teying to stop. (I cut my legs, it's kind of a release, it stops everythign else and I concentrate aon it and the physical pain and well, the emotional stuff goes to the back burner somehoe.) Anyhow, he i strying like crazy but he just doesn't understand and I am at a loss as to how to explain it to him, how to tell this man that I love so much that as much as anyting else, it's not his fualt, and I just dont' knwo how to. ANy advice ? Anyone talked to soemoen else about it and foudn a good way to make sense to someoen who is so lost in the whole subject? Or on how to make him understand that he isn't at fault?
Hope this makes sense. And thanks.
I am trying to be open with my hubby about the cutting, trying to talk to him, teying to stop. (I cut my legs, it's kind of a release, it stops everythign else and I concentrate aon it and the physical pain and well, the emotional stuff goes to the back burner somehoe.) Anyhow, he i strying like crazy but he just doesn't understand and I am at a loss as to how to explain it to him, how to tell this man that I love so much that as much as anyting else, it's not his fualt, and I just dont' knwo how to. ANy advice ? Anyone talked to soemoen else about it and foudn a good way to make sense to someoen who is so lost in the whole subject? Or on how to make him understand that he isn't at fault?
Hope this makes sense. And thanks.
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This site explains it very simply. I would personally add to it that the reason why you cut stems from something deep inside of you. Past histroy and things like that. Tell your husband that you are veryu appreciative of his support and maybe he can do some of his own research on the subject, but just remind him that you are not cutting because of anything he has done/said/not said/not done. it is your way of coping his could be golf, computer games, a punching bag. if they worked for you im sure you would use them too.
I dont know if i have helped. if that website is not any ood for what you need, there are thousands of them out there. I just googled "why do people cut", came up with heaps.
My husband told me this when he found my scars.
I tried to explain to him this was not his fault, nor his responsibiity. I am sure he was still hurting.
Now I cut in places that I think he wont find, and if he does eventally find them, I just tell him how old they were.
I dont care if he (my husband) understands it, I just dont want him to feel responsible for my choices.
Picture the sea and that is my head then you see the seaweed and that is all the thoughts that are in my head all of the time, the sand on the beach is the very front of my head, when the sea is out and all the seaweed is in the sea i am feeling ok, but when the sea comes in, it drags some of the seaweed with it, so if something happens that i cannot control my mind starts throwing my thoughts to the front of my head, a lot of the time the feeling to cut myself. I keep on cutting till i feel better. So when the sea starts dragging the seaweed back into the sea all is calm again.
I dont know if this helps in anyway, but my friend i told this to started to see it differently like this was somethimg i had to do just like the sea has to do this too.
Good luck x