i use to cut in junior high always taught" women in the family dont whine suck it up" type of attitude. at first it was like a release than by 7th if i didn't have it i would go insane. my friend got a shovel took me outside and said "dig a big hole and jump in thats where your heading. than dig a small one for (my cousin naomi) cause i bringing them down with me" it just stuck with my naomi looked up to me. i was hurting her. it took me a while but i stopped. I am 19. i am blind in one eye i can see colors sometimes shapes. well I just relasped literally 10minutes ago. i just had knee surgery fell at work, my aunt is dying i am gaurdian of her two kids naomi and amoni, plus take care of my mini stroked mother who i swear is bipolar doctor kinda agrees with me. while on crutchs. my dad works long hours. naomi is 9rs on amoni will be 2yrs soon. naomi is 9 has to share a bed with me while helping my gimpy butt and my mother. her mother is dying with cancer. her dad is jail/drugs. her step-father doesn't like her only cares about his child amoni, naomi looks out for amoni , she doesn't know i have lupus, but she knows something is up, her grades well there is tragedy. I feel like a volcano. and my dad wants me back into college next semester. i feel like going to explode!!!!!
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