Holy Crap!! I just a sign from God this morning. We got a call from a family friend n they told us that their son had committed suicid. I saw how hurt my parents were n I relized that I oculd never do that to my parents. Im glad that I have everyone here that helped me n told me everything n not to do it n in return God sent me a sign by showing me how they felt wit it being a friend of our family. I was so hurt I relized that I couldnt do that to my parents, friends, n family. I so greatful for everyone who is helping me n I just want to thank you all n Im gonna try so hard to move on from last year n today n relize that I have pple that care aobut me..Thank you all so much. I love everyone who is helping me get threw the hard times. I kno I lost my grandma almost a year n a half ago but I just cant move on n i still miss her n I want her back..I want her to hold me again..n her to tell me that she loves me so that I can love her more...You might think Im crazy but I beleive in signs n Im always gonna..until one day it hurts me..Im always gonna remember the way I felt going to Kanasa City while my gradmother laied in the hospital n died..Im gonna remember that call that my family got n I can imagin the sound of the gun going off at 5 in the morning n knowing that my friend had just killed himself. Im gonna try n stick it out..but kno its gonna take time n its gonna be hard..But I kno I have pple behind me n that I can come here for help or I can always go to a counsler..but sometime I think that they will look at me like im crazy. but when it comes down to it..I\'ll find the best way for the help I need n rite now its her. Once again..Thank you so much..LUV
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