well i've been battling with cutting myself for about ummm...2 yrs already...it all started with keeping everything to myself...i'm those kind of people that doesn't like to bother no one with my personal problems...not to long ago this guy that i had been talking for a year or so...well he just made me feel so bad i mean VERY BAD about myself...i mean i open my heart to him i told him i like him a lot...when i noticed that he stop calling me and stuff...i got the idea that he didn't like me...i mean i can't force no one to like me...when he started talking to me...the reason he started talking to me again was because he only wanted me for sex...i felt so bad because till this day i still have feelings for him...well one night i got fed up i mean i told him i was bored with him saying the same shit and stuff...he got mad and he told me so many horrible things...he told me i was fat, ugly, that one time he saw my car in the parking lot where i work and he didn't get off because i embarrsed him...that i was ugly witch...that the only reason he let me talk to him was to let me know that he doesn't talk to ugly girls like me...i mean he used against what i trusted him the most "liking him"...the worst part was that he was laughing...he told me other things but don't want to get into detail...anyways i stop talking to him so i wouldn't feel bad anymore because when i feel bad i start hurting myself really badly...he still calls me and stuff but i just don't want to feel bad...but i still like him a lot...i ask myself all the time i'm never gonna establish a stable relationship with no guy because of the way i am...i feel so helpless...
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