Last night, I made the mistake of having a few drinks, and I had a MAJOR breakdown last night. At a bar. In the bathroom. A *public bathroom* for crying out loud! Some minor scratches on my wrist, many many more on my knee... One rather deep, but not so deep that it will need medical attention, thankfully. A friend was with me, and fortunately she knew about this tendency beforehand, but she seemed shocked this morning when I told her that I don't remember any of it. Which I don't. As far as I remember, I was sitting and talking with some random people and having a good time, jump to a brief moment of clarity in the bathroom and seeing blood, jump to a brief moment waiting for my husband to pick me up, skip ahead to me being home and crying like my heart would explode in my chest. I tried to seek out counseling help this morning, but my insurance limits me to the student health center on campus, and because I'm not a student and only the spouse of a student, the only counseling services they'll offer me are couples counseling. So I feel like I have absolutely nowhere to turn. I need help, and no one will help me. I don't even know what set me off last night, it's like a switch got flipped and my brain turned off, and I woke up this morning and can't figure out why I'm all cut to pieces. Please, I need some help right now...
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