I'm watching my family fall apart at this moment. I have been since I was little. My grandparents are In the middle of a divorce currently, I'm at a new school(not fitting In as usual, Isolated always. Not to mention, my parents are smoking over-time(they both started when they were 11 or 12) I've watched my grandmother slowly pass on due to that, and I lost my other grandfather to that when I was 3...I'm terrified I'm going to lose my parents. I haven't talked to them about my SI. They found out about 2 years ago, but they think I stopped. My other grandparents are the ones divorcing. All my life I've been living with them some and my parents. I've been around the fights soo long, when I was about 7 my grandmother tried to kill herself, I had to chase her down with tears In my eyes and take the scissors out of her hand...It hurt. And now everything Is spinning out of control. Because of this problem with my grandparents, my parents have started smoking tripple what they used to. My grandfather, Is who I'm with right now, 24/7 he's depressed and It's not heping me, he doesn't know that I've been cutting more than usual since I've been here. I'm lost..I don't want to be here, I want to go home. I have nobody to talk to and I'm losing my mind. It's so hard to even make It through a day at school...I just don't know. If anybody can help me In any way, please do. Any Ideas on who I can talk to, programs, anything? Thank you.
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