I am a 34-year-old, married mother of 3. I have been on a downward spiral for the past year. I have had persistant joint pain for years without being properly diagnosed. I am now to the point that I can't work, can barely walk and am in constant agonizing pain. My joints are so stiff at times that I can barely move. We are on the verge of bankruptcy and my husband is ready to divorce me. I have a great doctor and he has me on several medications. Most recently it has decided to attack my cervical spine, which my doctor is very concerned about. I would like to talk with someone who is going through the same problems. No one seems to understand what I am going through and I desperately need advise on how to overcome the anger and resentment that I feel regarding my situation. Not to mention that I am scared to death that I am going to end up filing bankruptcy and losing everything in my life (and then what). How do I fight back??? My husband blames me for our current situation and thinks that I am a lazy bum. I feel like I have no control over my life and my body anymore. I spend all of my time trying to manage my pain and just be able to do normal day-to-day functions. I am constantly fatigued and can barely stay awake during the day. My number one priority over everything else is just taking care of my kids. No matter how much pain I am in or how much stiffness I have I refuse to let this affect me being there for my children. I don't know what to do. I feel like I am losing everything in my life from this disease and there is no way that I can fight back. I can't even work right now and I don't know how I am going to pay my bills. I refuse to be a victim of this disease, but I am not even sure if I have a choice in the matter. If anyone has any advise for me or encouraging words I would greatly appreciate it. I am in desperate need to communicate with someone that can relate to what I am going through. I feel all alone!!!
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