From my own knowledge....I would definitly postpone the wedding. Unless or Until he has gone to counseling for this & you have positive proof! If he is betraying you now,at a time when he should be so infatuated with you,he can't see straight. What will he be like after the wedding,when the relationship has cooled??

Again,from my own experience I've never witnessed this kind of situation working out! The same problems continue....Do you want to deal with this during your marriage?

There is nothing wrong with you!! On the other hand,he has a serious problem. This sounds like the makings of an addict!! You can't change him,HE HAS TO WANT TO! If you go through with the marriage as is,you'll be joining the rest of us in devastating pain! If you think your depressed now,just wait till after the marriage!! It's a LONG LONG road. Save yourself... You deserve better. You'd be jumping out of the frying pan straight into a hellish FIRE!! YES,you will get burned!! If you were my daughter,I would say RUN!!!

It's so easier said than done you know.....I love this man..the funny thing is we already went to counseling together and i guess it did not work. He said we can go back. I spend all day and night thinking about it and what really keeps saying the same things as before....what is so different this time for some reason he thinks it will get better after getting married but my brother proved that to be a lie....He cheated on his wife and got another girl pregnant basically the whole double life thing and actually has the nerve to involve me in it and he knows im going through the same thing...funny thing is they two of them go to each other for advice....Blind leading Blind ??? He says its my choice if if want to keep him in my life but he wants me and wishes things can get better...Iwish this just never happened and now I am miserable because i dont want to leave him but I am livid @ the sight of him

Marriage will not fix this!

Please...if it is at all possible for you to gain wisdom from the pain of others...DO NOT MARRY HIM!!!!

If you think it hurts now, imagine what it feels like when you have three children.

RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I really think you have to ask yourself some very difficult questions. Not only for yourself, but for your family, his family, and potentially the children that may come from you union. What is it about your fiance that makes you love him? Are those things that make you love him enough to marry him? What do you love about yourself? You have to remember that people change when they THEMSELVES want to change. You ultimalety can not change anyone. If he knows you are the one, why would he do something that he knows would hurt you? I think you need to follow your heart. True love is something that is not only felt, but seen in the actions of others. He has not changed. He has not proven to you he has changed. When my husband told me about his affair ( he met a woman online and most of the affair was done over the computer and his phone which had internet access...they met sexually one time after 2 years and then he ended it.) he took his computer out and ran over it, smashed it into pieces, and through it into the garbage. He also stuck a knife through his phone. He has shown me he has no contact with her and shows me that. Now, he doesn't spend anytime to himself, he spends his time with me. His actions have not shown you that you are TRUELY the one. He has not TRUELY come to that conclusion yet. I think it would be in your best interests to postpone your wedding. For YOU! It is scarey to think about starting all over with someone else, but by postponing your wedding, your not giving up, just giving him another chance. Don't allow him to make that promise to be faithful to you in front of God, your friends and family if he can not keep that promise. It hurts WAY worse when THAT promise has been broken. If you can't do that for you, do it for your unborn children. YOU DESERVE someone who will love you fully...take care of all the issues before your married. YOU DESERVE IT!

Give him this utlimatum: You are going to postpone the wedding until he can prove to you that he will no longer be involved on the internet. The cheaters would give their spouses all access codes to their e-mails, cell phones etc. but to be honest here that is not going to work for you. Your fiance needs to get rid of the computer all together since he continues to search it for OW or you need to install spy ware onto it. Your fiance can see how you are hurting. He see's the agony you are going through from his actions and it seems he just doesn't care. If he feels getting married is going to change this he is so wrong. I think he will look at it as: She knew I was doing this before we got married, she stayed with me and married me so why change now. You need to put your foot down.

Show him you will no longer put up with such disrespect to you, your feelings and most importantly the disrespect of vows that he would be saying on the day he married you. He's having his cake and eating it to. If he see's you postponing the wedding, he see's you taking all access codes to his cell etc. he seeing a woman who is not going to be run over by anyone. Take the power back and if you want to catch him put the spy kit onto his computer to see if he's living up to his end of the bargain if he agrees to your terms. Good luck with your decision because this is a big one for you and this will not be easy!!!!