I was in a complete mind game. I got a letter in the mail saying my H was having an affair. He denied and got mad at me for questioning. I found out the truth. He admitted but cont. to lie and said it was just sex 2 times. I called OW and she was pissed i had sex with him and fowarded all there e-mails to me. It hurt so bad to see he loved her and wanted to move in with her and my two young kids. After i got the e-mails i gave him a choice call her right now and end it or leave. He left and said he would be back in the morning and i was wrong to put him on the spot and not let him think. he came back the next day and made the call. Probably because he realized she was gone because she gave me the e-mails. So i wonder if he is with me because he doesnt want to be alone.....she left him...or he really does want to work on things. He says he wasnt seeing things right before and as soon as he realized it was wrong she was dead to him. He said i drove him to the affair and treated him bad after my mom died last june..he started the affair last oct. I feel the need to know everything that went on about the affair because i had to search and search to find the truth. and know so much per the e-mails and i feel i need to know EVERYTHING in order to get over it. I keep obsessing. If i talk at all about it with him he gets mad and defensive and turns things on me. Is this normal. Am i doing something wrong. I feel that he screwed up and should be answering all my questions kindly. I just want him to come out and say "i loved her, its true and i was wrong and will do anything to make everything right". But he is just telling me he was living in a fantacy and she didn't really mean much to him in an agry manner. I don't want anymore secrets and lies.
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