Does anyone else feel distant from everyone else? sometimes i feel so distant from my boyfriend, i feel so bad for him because he must feel very alone in this relationship, a part of me thinks that the distance is because he just doesnt understand what i;m going threw and i;m living i life that he can't relate too and that is closed off to him. i know you think that i should share this private world of mine but i just feel it would be to much, really needy people are a turn off. He all ready has to deal with mood swings, depression, anger. i hate every inch of my body feel to ugly to be alive, i hate going out side of my house, Im not fun so its not like he has a lot of reasons to stay. I cant even stand him looking at me, I cant bring my self to look at him, he thinks this is so weird, we are in the car driving and I turn my body away from him and wont look at him, I am always trying to hide my face because I think I look so ugly, everyone tills me that Im pretty which just makes me scared that they are going to someday look at me and see what I see. My skin disgusts me because my rapist touched it every part of me feels disgusting, i feel unhuman, its like i'm scared someone is going to some how see what happened to me if they look at me. i know they cant. How could anyone care of love someone that someone else thought was lower then dirt
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