well when any guy that I don't really know and trust all that well wants to drive me anywhere, I get nervous and paranoid that they are gonna take me off somewhere and do to me what that other guy did to me when I was 15. I'm always on edge when alone with a guy anywhere that I don't know that well.

When a guy holds my head with both hands or has his hands on my head when im doing anything with him.

when people yell... when anyone touches my neck... accept for my best friend.. and sometimes even then i can't handle it... big men... hearing the words rape or sa.. and violence...

I also sometimes have flashbacks when my husband and I have sex. This has been a strain on our relationship.

I get flashbacks everytime I use a public restroom. I get flashbacks whenever I see a man with dreads. I am triggered when someone talks about sex around me who doesn't know or sometimes if they do know. I get triggered by the thought of being intimate with a man. I get triggered when I lay down and try to fall asleep because its what I used to do when I was a kid to get my abuser to stop. I am triggered by male cashiers who want to talk to me...just to name a few...

My triggers include -
breath on my neck, ears, face, body; sucking on my ear lobes; any light (really gentle) touching anywhere on my body; water on my face; being teased; paps; fingers down there; the dark; thunder and unexpected loud noises; being shut in a room; closets; beer; anybody grabbing or touching me without letting me know; groups of people; parties; going to unfamiliar places; anybody raising their tone of voice; being intimidated; being stood over (looked down on); stream settings on spray bottles; being threatened; the dentist; unfamiliar men in my house; unfamiliar men in general; not being in control; feeling like I am losing control; being tied down or restrained in any way; braided leather belts; being alone; to name a few.

my old cell phone ring tone, khaki pants, certain phrases, being tied down, dark allies, walking under scaffolding, the word, the song that a local cab company uses that goes, "you don't know what you've got til its gone, they paved paradise and put up a parking lot," the names of certain streets

One trigger I have is the mall. The echoes really get to me. I don't know why....