Rape Support Group
If you or someone you know has been the victim of rape, this is the place to find support and get advice. If you want, discuss your experience, share your feelings, and meet others going through a similar situation.
When I was with my last serious boyfriend, it took me ages to tell him about the rape. When he found out, he was really angry and overprotective, but quickly went off the physical sides of things. Later, when our relationship was turning to shit he told me after he found out he found me a bit "tainted" because he assumed I'd never had sex before him. Ouch. Is this a regular thing, boys? Do all guys feel this way?
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
No, this isn't something that all guys feel - unfortunately as you've found out there are the idiots who don't understand; just take your time when you do meet someone new, make sure it's someone who's worthy of your confidence.
And by the by...you aren't tainted. At all. Not even a little bit.
I'm quite a bit older than you as well as most of you here. I was violently raped and left for dead by a stranger 23 years ago.
I was 25 at the time and engaged to be married within a month. I was also 6 weeks pregnant. After three months, my fiance and I went our separate ways. It could've had a lot to do with me or it could've been him or it could've been a combination of both. I don't know. All I know is the rape changed my life and the life of my unborn child.
I'm not quick to tell new men in my life of that experience. I just have this thing about it. I don't mind talking about it, but with men, I just feel like until I am comfortable with them and feel I know them, it's my private business until then.
I mean, what should it matter? Although it shouldn't matter one bit, I'm still protective over whom I tell of the male species. You never know how they might react. I learned that when the actual rape occurred 23 years ago. I lost my soul mate, the man that I loved more than life itself because although he tried, he just couldn't cope with it. I think that was more painful than the act of rape was.
So yeah, I would say men look at it a little differently. Not because you are tainted. I can't explain the difference between how men think and women think......... but they do think differently. Some of them might even say "Why didn't you fight"? Stupid question if you ask me. We aren't men but yet we are supposed to fight off the stronger species?
I would just get to know the new man in you life for awhile. I don't think your rape experience is one that should be discussed at the first date over dinner.
JMO