i have had nightmares and flashbacks about the rape by my ex.it happened last winter, aprilish. so after breaking up with him the nightmares went from constant to few, and theyve been goin on every so often. But since this valentines day(the anniversary of our first date), ive had nonstop nightmares about rape, the first night was a flashback and the next added more ppl raping me, each nightmare got worse. Then last night was the absolute worst nightmare ive ever had. It was completely fictional, but it ended up as my parents brainwashing me so my dad seemed like a 17 yr old(im 17 now) and with a completely different look. i kinda knew something was up, but i ignored it when he proposed to me(i know, gross, right?), and i had no idea it was him. so i was planning the wedding for about a year(in my dream) and the night of, my mind started returning to me.i suddenly knew it was him and i started breaking down. then i took my dad to the back room(during the prewedding reception) and told him to call the wedding off. he asked why.i said he was my father.then my mom came up behind me and bound and gagged me and literally dragged me down the aisle. when my mom woke me up from this nightmare by yelling from the other room, i woke up thinking the nightmare was real. i was shaking, crying, and i thought i was still bound and gagged, so i couldnt move or talk for a few minutes.it was without doubt the worst nightmare ive EVER had, and when i woke up i was thinking about filing for divorce and escaping the country and changing my name.it didnt even occur to me that i had school today.any advice on getting rid of these nightmares?
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I am a rape survivor. The abuse stopped in 2010. But here recently I have found that the reprocussions have started now. I have a chance with my significant other for a real future and I am struggling. I don't feel like I am worth more than I am now. And I don't want to continue the pattern