i was raped on my last birthday by a man i though was a friend..i can't remember much of that night but what i do remember seems to pop up at the most inappropriate time..my boyfriend has been somewhat supportive after his intial anger..but i can't seem to enjoy being intimate with him..i know in my head that he is not the one that hurt me,but when we are in the middle of lovemaking i start to cry..i know it has got to be just as hard on him..how can i get past the flash backs before it ruins my relationship?i talked to my doctor about it and she put me on celexa and it has helped with controling my crying all the time and controling my anger towards everyone and everything,and i find i can get my butt up and actually clean, and leave the house..but in the love department..it just isn't helping..what do i do? i don't think i really want to remember all the events of that night..i have kept this from my family but of course my boyfriend knows..i just want to get past this and live life as normally as possible..any suggestions?
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