Its been a little over 4 years since I was raped and I still think about it alot. My husband and me never talk about it. The guy that raped me was supposed to have been my friend. He raped me one night when we was out walking around the neighbor hood. I went to the police and was pressing chareges, but a week before the trial he put a gun to my head and threatened to kill me and my daughter if I didnt drop the charges. I eventually dropped the charges and they charged him with intimidating a witness. He did two years in prison over it. I dont know why im still having nightmares about it. I just cant stop myself from thinking how I could of prevented it from happening. I knew how violent he could be I just didnt think he would do anything that bad to me. I found out that he got out of prison a couple of months ago and I just wish he would die or move or anything. Is it wrong to wish death on him for what he did to me? I just dont know what to think and I wish I could forget the whole thing ever happened but I even dream about it.Plus I have noone to talk to about this. I feel worthless and ashamed. my husband makes me feel like a woman but we cant even do certain things sexually because of what happened to me.
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