Rape Support Group

If you or someone you know has been the victim of rape, this is the place to find support and get advice. If you want, discuss your experience, share your feelings, and meet others going through a similar situation.

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/ Rape Support Group

IS IY OK NOT TO GET INVOVE WITH ANYONE.

deleted_user
deleted_user
I WAS RAPED A YEAR AGO FOR THE LAST TIME BY MY CHILDREN,S PA.I DON,T FEEL COMFORABLE TALKING TO MEN OUTSIDE.I DON,T A MAN IN MY HOME EITHER.MY KIDS FEEL THE SAME WAY.WILL THIS ALWAYS BE LIKE THIS FOR ME NEVER ABLE TO TALK TO MEN?
realitychick
realitychick
dear you need to be able to talk to someone and where you like it or not there will be men that you have to talk to in the future the guy who fixes the car the repair man that came to the house to fix the A/C you can not hide you must go on with your life
deleted_user
deleted_user
It is perfectly ok for you to decide that at this point in time you don't want any involvement with men in your life - in a romantic or relationship way. It is totally unrealistic to cut men out of your life altogether and unhealthy for your recovery (as not all men are rapists or abusers...some women are, what you gonna do cut everyone off!). As you move thru your healing your view may change and you may become open to men in your life again. Best of luck with your journey.
Thriver
Thriver
Probably not, but for right now, I say go with what you feel. Yes, there are bad men out there, and you and your kids don't have a feel for who is bad and who is good - you were in close contact with a bad one for so long. Take your time and you really do not have to have a man in your safe place (home) at all, ever, if you don't want to.
As far as men you encounter outside your home, that you have less control over, but of course there is less risk. Do what you feel comfortable with. And don't push your kids to adjust. On the other hand, remember that many men are wonderful and good, and especially if you have sons, keep that message alive. Try to have contact with good, safe men. It does not have to be very close contact. Good luck and I wish you all the best on your recovery from your nightmare.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Do you mean men generally or just in relationships?
I'm sort of back at this point again now after my marriage has broken down - I've got plenty of male friends who I feel safe with and I'm slowly learning to trust my own judgment about people - I just don't have a clue how to do that with someone I'm interested in, so I'm sort of avoiding any romantic involvement at the moment - not deliberately/consciously, I just know that subconsciously I am still sending out 'back off creep' signals to men who probably don't deserve it!
thegoober
thegoober
i have trouble getting into relationships still and im 19 and the last time it happened to me was when i was 11 ish... so u arent alone...
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