There's not a fine line between right and wrong. I think there's truth in almost anything - and in this situation looking at it from the outside in I'd say he's right in the sense that you're not the only one that has been through hard times, but at the same time he is not right in saying you need to pull yourself together. Everyone copes in their own way - some people"Pull It Together" and deal with it internally, some people deal with it outwardly and all the ranges inbetween. Calling you a dirty slag was just his inconsiderate way of trying to hurt you so you would see how he was feeling. It most likely was said in the heat of the moment, but that's no excuse it was piercing and childish. Him saying you used him to get over your own issues is slightly concerning. He may feel like that because he feels the focus in the relationship is mostly on you and he needs equal time focused on him and his struggles, or - hopefully not - maybe that's how he views your relationship, you're each using each other as a coping handrail, but hopefully not. I believe he was justified in being angry that you left without any notice when he has a little girl. Children don't deserve to have significant people withdrawn from their lives and put back in or new ones replacing them all the time but unfortunately that's the reality of a single parent. He knew that was the price when you started seeing each other. And as for the insult, calling you messed up, I think he's just trying to cling onto what he can because it hurts so much to have such a wonderful person be in your life one day and not the next - which is again no excuse but may help you understand where he's coming from. It's his defense mechanism, most people throw darts, insults, or harsh words at things or people they don't understand.

All I'm trying to say is for the most part in the severity of the comments he wasn't right, but the basic concepts of his comments are surely something to consider. I hope this helps.

Whit