Hi, I'm new here to this site. Have alot of time on my hands and wanted to meet and talk to new people who understand for once. I was raped by a guy that let me stay at his place two years ago when I was 15. It was horrible. He got me so drunk. It was hard because I had no place to stay at the time but had to leave and be on the streets because of what he did. I'm kind of numb about it and try not to think about it. I'm afraid of it happening again as I have been moving around staying at different places putting myself in the same situations where it could happen again. Seems like that's all guys want from me. I wish I could tell if a guys is going to be that way or not up front you know? But there's no way of knowing really. Have to have a roof over my head and food to eat so have to trust sometimes even if I don't want to. I wish I was all fat and ugly then maybe nothing would happen to me again but then again no guys would want to help me either because it seems like they do for their own motives, to get me in bed eventually or something. This guy that I'm staying with now seems really cool so far but I'm still on edge and distrustful. If I think too much about the rape I feel like I'll fall apart and lose it so I try to stuff it behind me. Alot of girls have gone through alot worse. It seems like every girl has dealt with some form of sexual abuse or rape. What is wrong with men these days? Are there any to be trusted at all?
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