It's been.... a while since I was raped. I have a beautiful, loving and gentle partner who also happens to have the unfortunate what ever you want to call it to have also been raped. In some ways it's differant since we're both female and were raped by men. But at the same time it's not all that differant. I know the key is communication. She has no trouble telling me what she likes and doesn't like. But for me it's hard. The rape went on for years and the rapest was my father and he would strangle me if i struggled. My lover is gentle and I love her so very much. But I don't always know how to communicate with her and sometimes it's only because she asks that I find it in me to say 'no' or 'stop'. How can I have a healthier sex life?