I was raped three months ago. The guy was inside my house. He shoved pills down my throat I tried to fight but he kept cutting me with a knife "my own exacto knife" I use for scrapbooking. he wore a mask, he raped me twice. he told me that he was going after my husband then he was comming back. he even kissed my check and gently told me that this was just the beginning. I am soo terrified!!! The person who found me picked up items from off the floor, shut all my doors. the rapist poured bleach into my toilet burned the condom,and the wrapper. The EMT moved many things around to get to me the guy ran over my legs with my electric wheel chair I had passed out. The police said it was premeditated and they found no evidence inside my house. I had the rape kit done, they could not find anything to help them. I feel as if it was my fault. I never took off his mask or remember his voice,teeth, or smell. will he come back?? Will the State Troopers ever find the person? I live with my inlaws "next door to my house" Everyday is terrifiying woundering if he will be back. He knew my sleep patterns, my name, where and the times that my husband works. I also have a great fear that he will kill my husband. The police say they have no leads unless i remember or know who this person is. will the memories come back? We are in the process of building a house in another town because i cant live in my own house anymore. My family tells me it was my fault for not locking my door, I got what i deserved. Now i feel very guilty for turing my husbands life upside down. My family doesn't belive that it happened because it wasn't in the paper. I don't know why it wasn't in the paper, my sister is the only one who believes me. she was there when they took photos off the cuts on my face,throat, "other places i can't mention" I cant wear shorts due to the scares he left on me. the only good thing is that the case will be opened for a long time they will be getting him for attempted murder due to the pills he shoved down my throat, if i wasn't found when i did i would have died of liver failer and drug overdose, due to all the medications that i have been on because i have a movement disorder. will he ever be caught????
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