I don't know if my experience is unique, but it certainly seems unusual. Last week before my 49th birthday, I was the victim of an attempted rape in my home. I am the divorced mother of 2 boys, 15 and soon to be 21. The man who assaulted me was the best friend (in high school) of my oldest son whom I had known since he was about 14 and was like one of my own. When he asked to crash here, I didn't think twice though I know he has been using meth (though he wasn't "tweeked" that night). I was being a "mom" and probably ignored some warnings. He initially made some inappropriate "passes" when he came in to request another pillow. I got him to leave and thought, "well, that was weird but he won't do anything else." I was wrong. I did spend an hour and a half resisting and talking him out of this from 3 am to 4:30 am. I never realized in my own mind until later Tuesday what happened. Just wondered why a 20 year old was trying to seduce someone who had been like a mom to him. I eventually did file a police report which was tough but I hope will help him in the long run.
What is full circle is that at 14, my brother in law who is 8 years older than me started making "passes" and continued until I was 17 when I told him never to touch me again. I only told my parents of one incident (though I did tell them it wasn't the first) and they said they would talk to him and that he'd never do it again (but he did). I always discounted my own feelings and thought I did something to bring it about since I was a girl who hit full physical maturity at 12 and was curious with boys MY OWN AGE. I thought of my brother in law as a brother and it took years for me to acknowledge the abuse of my trust. I only told my sister last year. He has been abusive verbally to her and her children for a long time. The event last week included much more attempt at sexual contact than my brother in law but didn't last as long (hours versus years). So, now I am going back to resolve what I thought I'd left behind. I am not sure how to confront the original abuser from my teen years. I know the recent event will probably have that aspect once they track the young man down. (It's been hard for me not to say "the boy" or "the kid" because that was who I knew, I don't know the man). That's my story in a nutshell. My children and my boyfriend know what happened. I also want to be able to help them.