I only started using pain pills a couple of years ago. I have always been a professinal woman, owned my own home, took care of myself. I basically got mixed up with these pills after I was dumped by my sister's friend. My sister has been an addict for many years. Her husband had a clean friend who I fell in love with...our relationship was amazing, until he dumped me. I started dabbling in pills with my sister. Then I met my current boyfriend. He's been struggling with his own substance abuse issues for over 20 years. We started using these pills together. I watched myself lose my home and all of my income to pills. How did I let this happen? My boyfriend still lives with me and I love him very much. He doesn't work so we're on one income and we have a pill problem. I'm in my home that will soon be foreclosed on. I work a normal job, but my pill use is interfing. I told him that I want to get clean, several times. And we've tried. We go a few days then he mentions it and we're off to the races again. I should be grateful...we don't use needles, we only do about 1-2 a day each. But I want to either get clean or at least only do it on the weekends. He tells me that I can't do it. I know if he wasn't here, I wouldn't use nearly as much or as often. Before he was here, I always made my job number one and my use was just occasional on some weekends. I know that I am more important than what he wants and that I SHOULD leave him. But, I love him. I guess I just want support on this one. I am sure I can't be the only person out there with the same problems.
How do I even begin to deal with this? This is not only a substance abuse issue, it's a co-dependency issue. Be honest and I will listen.