
Pregnancy Support Group
Welcome to the waiting room for anticipating moms and dads. Whether you're expecting your first or a new little brother or sister, meet other parents in this community who are also looking forward to a new addition to the family.

deleted_user
so my mother is getting on my nerves! she keeps wanting to come over to my house and just sit if im alone and my husband is at work because she doesnt wantt me to be alone. she thinks because i havent been feeling at that great the last couple of days (i'm 35 weeks pregnant) that i'm gonna go into labor and be alone at home. i told her i have a phone and i will call you but she insists that she is gonna come over here and just babysit me. now i am the first born and this is the first grand child on both sides of our family but geeze woman back off! i don't know ow to talk to her about this and i really need to before the baby comes because she's already giving her opinion on how my husband and i should raise our baby and what works and it's past the point of it just being a n opinion, she's basically trying to tell us how its gonna be done! i need some help here guys on how to deal with this. my husband works 5 days a week and i'm fine with being home alone. i actually kind of like it because i can do whatever i want and he goes to school 3 nights a week and she wants to be here every time he's away but then still won't leave when he gets home. HELP! i've go to stop this madness because its stressing me out and i dont want it to affect the baby.
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The best thing to do is to take a deep breath, and realize that she is not doing this on purpose - and none of it is evil or hateful. They are just bored, and have nothing else to obsess about. They think they are being helpful, when they are really not. I have become quite honest with my mom by telling her nicely that I'd like her to only offer advice if I asked for it, and that we would simply like to share our baby with grandma, not have her take care of her and tell us how to do things. I had to repeat this to my mom several times. Know that you can't teach an old dog new tricks, and she may still continue to do this annoying stuff. Just stand your ground, and keep telling her to back off nicely. Also, it helps to desensitize yourself from her annoying ways - easier said than done, I know!
Good luck!
There's probably not a lot you can do expect understand that she is coming from a place of being so excited for you and for her and having normal mom concerns. Let her know that you appreciate her concern and caring for you and that if she needs anything, you will call her and let her know. You could even kind of lie and say that being around people is making you stress out a little bit and you just need some alone time to really relax. Try that and in the meantime, feel lucky. There are so many women who have no support from their families during this time- and many more who aren't near their families to get support when they need it. I would much rather that my mom be a little overbearing but supportive and comforting than the alternative.
Have you tried telling her that you're going to take a nap? Or would she be like my mom and make herself comfy on the couch and nap at the same time? Can you think up and errands that you "need" her to do that would take a really long time? It wouldn't stop her from coming over, but it would keep here there a shorter period of time.
You could just make a point of leaving before she gets there or right after she leaves. Kind of passive aggressive, and she would probably be calling the hospital if you weren't there when she got there, but it's a thought.