I am 42 years old and a mother of a 14-year-old son. Last summer i got pregnant. But i finally decided to give up the child because I had too much worries --- my old age both for me and for the coming child, my Phd study (I am in my first year of phd program), my career (I am teaching full-time in a university while working on the phd program), my son (I won't have much time and attention to him, which made feel that I betrayed him, a guilty feeling)and the age gap between my son and the coming baby. But, after the abortion, I felt much more guilty and regreted. I suffered from sleepless nights. I couldn't have a look at any pregnant women and little babies. I couldn't concentrate on my work and study. I was so bothered by the guilty feeling that I want to get pregnant again. Now, i am pregnant for 7 weeks. But the worries that had been with me last summer often come back to me. And, i feel extremely tired and lazy after the pregnancy. What is worse is that i can't tell my pregnancy to my friends and relatives. They all think I shouldn't have the idea of having another child at this age (after forty). So, I do hope i can get people's advice and help. What should i do? Please help! Thank you!
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