I thought I had found safety when I left Provo and moved to a smaller town in Utah. My boyfriend was very abusive and I knew the only way to survive was to get out. After a couple of years I learned to relax and after 5 years I let it go and stopped thinking about him and what he had done to me. Nearly 10 years after I broke it off with him (a year and a half ago) he tracked me down. He knocked on my door and when I answered it (not realizing it was him) him and 3 of his friends pushed their way in and took turns raping me. It only got worse from there. Every few days they came back and raped me again. After several months of trying to keep him out of my house, reporting to the police and continuously being raped, he laid low and stopped coming around. I left the little town I was in and went to Orem in hopes that I would be safe. It didn't take long for him to track me down again. I was in Orem only a few weeks before he found me and he, alone, raped me. I couldn't make him stop. He raped me repeatedly before getting up and walking away. A couple of days later he came back with several of his friends and they spent I don't know how long taking turns. They came back every few days for several months and no matter what I tried to keep them out it did no good. At one point after they were done raping me, he stood over me and urinated on me. I couldn't take it anymore and decided to break my lease and run. Still it took time and he wouldn't stop. I don't know how many times he raped me before I was able to get away. The day I left he cornered me and dragged me into my apartment. He said "you can run but you can't hide" and he raped me so brutally that I thought he was going to kill me. He said he would stop if I came back to him. I agreed and told him I would finish packing and we could meet. He left and I grabbed what I could and ran. I didn't dare say in one place for very long so in September when I was last raped I went to my cousin's house. I was there barely two weeks when fear took over and I left. I moved in with a friend but still I looked over my shoulder and made sure I wasn't being followed. It didn't take long before I just couldn't take it anymore and let the extreme fear chase me out of the state. I wonder every day if he's going to find me. I'm so afraid that he won't kill me but he will continue to rape me. I am so so scared! I know I need help getting beyond the trauma that has been caused by this. I don't know what to do. I just know that it takes time to get things set up in a new state and I feel so alone.
I wanted to ask if I could have some prayers sent to my family. I have a few family things going on today and wanted a few extra prayers. It would mean the world to me. Thank you in advance. I would ask if it wasnt so important.
My liver function is poor and my recent scan scan showed my spleen is enlarged. I feel like crying. I have a blood test right now then we will see who i need be reffered to either spleen route or liver route. Please wish me luck that this isnt going to be anything really bad.