Since I brought it up in another post. I have a particularly bad reaction to a certain hospital from multiple incidents in my life, in my city.
After John's passing it multiplied tenfold. I would shake, hyperventilate and mentally fall apart with just the name mentioned, let alone passing the building. Going in the building I go to vertigo.
Over the years I have needed to go there for others I care enough to try for.
My sister has Parkensen's now in it's 9th year and went in to that hospital last night. I called and stayed on the phone with her awhile last night, hoping that this would be an overnight meds adjustment trip as had happened before. She was still affected and her speech was slurred after hours of treatment and 2 CAT scans. They were not able to do the MRI because of her tremors. This morning I called and she didn't sound better, so I went and met my BIL there. I took the time to approach the hospital from a different direction and took 1/2 med for anxiety just to be able to see her for myself. I managed to stay a couple of hours and take lunch with the brother in law after they sedated her to try and stop the tremors again.
They are going to do another CAT scan for comparative incase she had a stroke. If that has no clear answer they well try again for a MRI. Her speech is still not clear and they will be setting up therapy for that and physical therapy for a walker. It may be that her Parkensen's just took a leap. She is younger than me.
I am very afraid for her or I would not have been able to override my own reactions to go there. My reactions came as a backwash after I came home. And I am still feeling them hoping that getting them out here will help.
Her husband has his own procedure on Monday and will need a driver, he asked if I would. I said yes. So Monday for sure I will be there again. Tomorrow is not yet determined.
I’m trying really hard to move forward in a new relationship. The guy (who I’ve been with for just over a year) that I’m with and I are very happy together.. aside from lately, even though we’re moving in together to a place to ourselves without out current roomate in a week. I’ve been going through a bit of of depression.. and having been having feelings of extreme low self worth come...