A bit about me. I've been a Christian since I was 17, I'm 39 now. I've generally liked church, but since my PTSD symptoms have flaired up and I've been facing my childhood abuses, I dread going. I feel very condemned by what I hear and by what people say to me. I don't know if it's me, my thinking being twisted, or what. Yesterday I felt like I was experiencing a major breakthrough, I actually started to feel sad about my past, numb was all I had felt up until now. The pastor starts preaching and says that we're sad when we're not walking with Jesus, sadness, leads to depression which leads to oppression, which leads to addiction. It took all of my energy to sit there, I thought my husband would be upset if I walked out. I don't want to go back. I don't want another person to tell me that this won't take as long as I think, that I need to cast my cares on God, lay my burdens at His feet and He'll give me joy. I don't believe that I will be miraculously healed, or it would have happened already. Ughh! Anybody else struggle with church?
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