im really struggling right now. Im very focused on my weight. I do this when im dealing with hard emotions. I want to be almost anorexic thin again. I have that picture of me saved as a back ground on my phone to remind me what i can get back to i aviod bad foods and eat less. Thing is i want it right now. I hate thos fat lump i am. Im not at my heavist weight but it was close. Ive lost 5pounds in last 2 weeks. I feel good about that but there is still 24 pounds to loose to just look even half good. Im gross i really am disgusting. Its cos my eating disorder i got fat but its going also to be my eating disorder i get thin. Thin is good for me and fat is bad for me.( this is not my opinion of other people purely for my body)
ugh. Its hard work avioding food so much but it feels aswome and powerful to aviod successfully. Ive slipped once but rest time ive done good.
A friend of mine sent me this video and it made me laugh, so I thought I'd share. : )https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFptlmGCOVI
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