I just need to get this all out and get some input if I can. It's regarding my last post about my roommate's rent hike.
My roommate and I haven't yet talked again about the rent hike. I'm firm on not going above 575 but I feel like I shouldn't have to because some dumbass coworker at her job said she'd pay 600 to live here. Would that person really move in? Would it work out? They are both teachers so they would all be here over the summer together. Something tells me, given how her kids are, this person wouldn't stick around long term. I love her kids and can tolerate them being kids. But most single adult women without kids, like this other person, can't tolerate that, teacher or not. And I'm certain I'd be a far more helpful roommate overall.
So we will talk about it at some point again. She's waiting on her tax return to see if 575 is acceptable.
But in the mean time, I've been doing my budget. I use a spreadsheet to make it out for each month and then the year.
I substitute teach. No work in the summer. Which means I'd have to work doubles at my secondary almost every weekend plus most Fridays of one shift this summer just to pay rent and gas. I have to pay gas to travel to all these places, which do add up because I don't go to the same store every weekend. I don't save anything and I put mileage on my van just to pay rent.
During the week, her, I and her kids will be here since she's a teacher. As tolerant as I am, I love when I'm home and they leave. So during the week, it will be harder.
During the year, SSD goes to rent and many basic expenses. I'd say about half of subbing goes to the rest of the basics. So I save half my subbing money and anything else from weekend work. That's if there aren't any unforseen expenses. And there ALWAYS ARE.
I'm torn. I'm busting my ass to pay rent even at the lower current rate.
If I left after school was out in May, and didn't work this summer, I'd save $3200 beyond expenses. That's becasue i'm paid a month after I do any work. SSD would cover my basics as I was camping and traveling.
If I stayed here and worked almost every weekend, I'd save $2500 beyond expenses. But I'd be stuck here during the week and sacrificing every weekend. No travel because it would all go to rent and expenses or would eat into that $2500. Or I could travel, not pay rent, not even worry about working this summer and still save $3200.
So basically the only reason to stay put this summer is the go back to work during the year subbing and rent here again. But I feel like I'm literally working to just pay for rent and gas and wear and tear on the car. It also takes away time and energy from my other goals ie being self employed and gaining more independence through it.
Another thing to consider: I don't do well indoors. Let me explain. I need camping. I need the outdoors. I feel stifled if I am at a school subbing all day and can't get outside. Usually I can but not always. And when I'm here at home, I get complacent, binge watching Netflix, and my mood slips if I do that for too many hours or days.
My long term goal: travel, camping, self-employment, and eventually, building a tiny home or refurbished mobile home and either buying land or renting a plot. Ideally, I'd spend maybe 6 months per year in Texas and the other 6 months in places like Colorado (Texas summers are horrible.)
Like I said in the other post, my side gig can be done almost anywhere in the country on weekends. I coul dfind a good doggie boarder/daycare for Lexi only for the days I work and it would still financially benefit me. No rent needed.
I guess I'm torn. I'm torn because I'm scared. I'm scared because I lack faith in myself to make anything work out (that's ptsd talking). I'm still in EMDR. I want to talk about all of it with the therapist this week. Thoughts? Thanks for making it this far.
I need to spend most of my time outdoors anyway to feel human. By staying and paying rent, I lose out in the long run on my mental health and most of it goes to rent anyway.
I am into the "feeling REALLY depressed" mode. I've been pretending everything fine, and that I want to be some what part of the people around me, BUT I DON'T. I don't want to do anything, I feel done, just done putting forth effort to do anything. I don't want to eat, drink, and I don't even care anymore about whether I sleep or not, I don't care that my body hurts all the time, I...
anxiety is to high can't sleep ..can't drive ..trying to manage it ...just need to talk ...I think I am just stressing ..my head won't shut up ...