Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
Hi,
I'm not sure whether I am blocking without being aware I am doing this or whether I am blacking out. Last week at work I was to do what we call a batch. Before I closed I was to make sure my tape matched the computer totals. I swear to all of you it did balance, I swear on my life. Now two days ago we had to write chq's for these batches only to discover that not one of them balanced. And not only that documents were missing from a few of them and moved to a different batch. Could I doing this????? My brother friend on this site died two weeks ago, I have noticed that I been talking out loud more. What is going on with me. I'm really scared. I can't afford to make these types of mistakes. I"m too embarassed to tell my family. And heaven forbid work finds out I would probably lose my job. Please any advice.. I know I should probably talk to a therapist or crisis line. Right now I just need to know if anyone else has gone through this.
I'm not sure whether I am blocking without being aware I am doing this or whether I am blacking out. Last week at work I was to do what we call a batch. Before I closed I was to make sure my tape matched the computer totals. I swear to all of you it did balance, I swear on my life. Now two days ago we had to write chq's for these batches only to discover that not one of them balanced. And not only that documents were missing from a few of them and moved to a different batch. Could I doing this????? My brother friend on this site died two weeks ago, I have noticed that I been talking out loud more. What is going on with me. I'm really scared. I can't afford to make these types of mistakes. I"m too embarassed to tell my family. And heaven forbid work finds out I would probably lose my job. Please any advice.. I know I should probably talk to a therapist or crisis line. Right now I just need to know if anyone else has gone through this.
deleted_user
Hi Rowan, your behavior really concerns me. I'm not sure what your trauma was, but some of the symptoms of PTSD effects long term and/or short term memory where you have lapses of time. The things you describe can also be indicative of other possiblly undiagnosed issues as well. Yes, you need to talk to a therapist, and if you find that there are longer lapses in your memory, you need to get in as soon as possible.
deleted_user
Rowan, like revpatty, I'm not sure what your situation is in detail, but I can tell you that I am at the beginning of therapy for PTSD and my capacity to pay attention to detail, to concentrate, and to remember things is at an all-time low. I am in a very demanding profession in terms of these things, and I know how scary it can be. You do need to get to a therapist and discuss this. Mine has told me that this is a fairly common symptom of PTSD often brought on by one who needs to be more engaged in processing thoughts and feelings, or one who is currently processing vast amounts of information. A professional will be able to work with you on this until things even out, which they should if you put the work in. But if this continues to be so drastic, I would certainly discuss with the therapist your desire to have a complete physical and mental work-up. Hope this helps.
deleted_user
Thank you to both of you. You answered my question. I appreciate the insite.
deleted_user
is there anyone at your work who could have done this? anyone else have access to these areas?
deleted_user
hey,i know how scared you are. i have the same thing happen to me. it's called disociation. are you seeing anyone to help you get through this? i highly recommend that you see a psychiatrist or your doc or something and tell them what's going on. i have hurt myself really badly without remembering any off it
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