I have PTSD. I was sexually abused. I did not start dealing with until 8 months ago when I started experiencing symptoms that are fucking dumb and ruing my life, having night and day mares, running away as far away as possible and then eventually lost the love of my life in March. I feel like I am going crazy. It is ruining my career, my friendships, my life. But I dont know what that life was to begin with. We create ourselves, but when you have a faulty foundation your creation falls apart. I wrote a note to my lover telling her that I built her a wall in china and to make like a bull in a china shop and try to run through it. Thats what it is. Its great and its small and its never going to make it through the wall. I was fully functional and had a successful career. Now is a different story.
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