I have been dealing with my abuse for about 10 years now and things had been going ok for me. Then I started having major health problems and lost my job and had to move home with my parents. Back into the house I was abuse in for nearly 10 years. I have started having flashbacks and panic attacks. I am having to see or hear from my abuser all the time. My dad doesn't seem to understand why I am not "over it" by now and why we just can't be friends. I am so tired of having that discussion with him and no matter what I say he just doesn't get it. I think that my family would be better off if I was gone. My abuse has ruined my entire family and if I died they wouldn't have to think about it all the time. I have been praying that I could just die and came close a few weeks ago but it didn't happen and that is why my mind keeps going to suicide as the answer. I just can't take all the stress, pressure and unhappiness that I have brought upon my family.
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