Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
It has been 5 years since my fiance committed suicide when we were at home. The nightmares have mostly gone away and so have the day time flashbacks. Of course, there are life events that come up that cause the nightmares to come back, but they don't stay more than a couple days. But the thing that has stayed with me, and I feel as if it will never go away, is the Hypervigilance. My counselor described it to me as being almost paranoid but it is not paranoia. I feel like a freak! I have to double and triple check my door when I lock it to go to work. And even then as I am driving off I question if I locked it. I never use to be a light sleeper, and now the slightest noise wakes me up at night. I am scared to death to have someone I just met, especially a man, over to my place because then he will know where I live and what will he do when I am not home? I moved into my current place 3 years ago and someone had to stay with me for 2 weeks straight. I was just so panic stricken and scared to stay alone. My counselor explained that saying I have to create a comfort zone and when I am outside of that I freak out and panic. I don't even like to be gone at night with friends too long. I would rather be at home with my dog and cat. They comfort me and help with the panic I feel.
I mean, it has been 5 years! When is this going to go away? Am I going to be like this forever? I hate feeling this way.
I mean, it has been 5 years! When is this going to go away? Am I going to be like this forever? I hate feeling this way.
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I gave my 2 week notice last Friday 13th. Now to join you fine people in a life of leisure and nothing else to do but to look out for myself....is it just me or does that sound pretty boring? My goal was to live to retire and I guess having to take early retirement because of health reasons wasn't exactly the way I had planned things. I just can't stay in that building that is reeking mildew...
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Has anyone tried these supplements? Do they give MGers more quality of life by improving memory and overall well being?Thanks!Barbel
I hide out here in my home with my cats, and find it hard to go out as well.I went back to doing what I did when I lived in the same town as my ex.I worry about things at the house, is it secure?I worry about not being out to long.I worry that someone is out there when I am the most vulnerable.I drive a differant way to the store doc appts. ect I feel like I did with him, if I don't drive the same way everyday, I am harder to follow, no routine.
Vent it like you just did to us, we all understand and will be here with you.
I now am making a concious effort to do things that are challenging as I have found that by repetition they become far less terrifying. I have gone from being absolutely demolished by an experience to now merely anxious. It is a slow process though and there are some things I have to feel very strong to do, but I can now occasionally do them, which is progress.
It is understandable that your need for safety is in your every move. please be compassionate with your behaviors. How long have you been in therapy? It is gonna take some time. I know it is frustrating but do make sure you feel your councilor is doing a good job...fr example...does he/she work with EMDR and or cognitive behavioral therapy? I think those are essential for a good trauma therapist. I recommend reading "Waking the Tiger" and " The Body Remembers". both will explain how it all works. I find reading a great comfort.
Take Care...I think our recovery depends on how much effort we are willing to put to the task. It will require an understanding and a real measure of acceptance...not just...can i turn it off now...I don't like it any more. I understand that desire very much so...but that is one desire and the then there is the work involved.