so yesterday during therapy,i brought up how,when i first started seeing him 5 years ago, i had told him one of my main goals was to have a richer life,and how i just do not,how,i haven't really worked on that.
in his empathic nature,he told me that i have had a few set backs since then,and he has since stopped pushing me to write...(my mental illnesses have caused me to abandon my dance/acting/and writing careers).
i have managed to stay out of the hospital for 3 years now,and am in a healthy relationship,however my PTSD,my eating disorder,and my social anxiety make it tough to move forward.
people will say,"volunteer" "Yeah but,yeah but...." "write a little each day" "Yeah but,yeah but..."
i'm sorry,i don't exactly know here i am going with this...(*sigh* just as i do not know where i am going with my life)
i dunno....does anyone get where i'm coming from?
i mean my OCD and my PTSD make it very scary to even leave the house,and my OCD gets in the way of my writing and my social anxiety makes taking another acting class at this point impossible...(This are just some of my "Yeah buts....")
so...so,so,how,in the face of all of this do i even strive to have a richer life?
because i truly have no idea....
The parents of my grandchildren are divorce dancing. Dunno what the results of that drama will be, nor is it mine to sort in any event. Prayers in progress. The GK's (2 & 5) are in protective custody with the other grandparents and Hubs and I are preparing for our first week with them since the police took the children away from both parents. We don't know the other grandparents very well. We...
Why?Why did you hurt me? What did I do wrong?Why am I not good enough the way that I am? Do you not love me? Do you not care?I tried to be what you wanted me to be!Why did you steal my childhood? Why didn’t you love me for me?Why did you not want me? Why did you not hesitate on giving me up?Why I no more than a sex toy? To do with what you wanted and discard?Was I not the child you wanted?Was I...