Well, I have been symptomatic now for about 2-3 months. I recently started dating and just kept getting rejected....I still don't know why. I internalized it and came to the conclusion that it must be me. That somehow as a person I am missing an essential part in my make up as a person. Whether it is true or not is irrelavent. What came from it is what matters. It triggered my PTSD in a way I have never felt it before. I literally feel like I'm going crazy. I'm fine one minute, sobbing the next, lots of feelings of fear, doubt and insecurity. Throw in a lot of low self-esteem and wahla it's me. I'm Ally pleased to meet you. Don't really know what the healing process is going to be like i have good mental health professionals in my life. I guess I just have to feel these feelings....but boy does it suck. I feel like they are going to kill me they are so powerful and uncontrollable. Just thought I could start a discussion on the healing process, what it entails, what has worked for you during the really hard times, how far you have come or if your just beginning let's hear from you too. I just wanted to get to know some of you and thought this would be a great way to start.
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??