Imagine going to your place of employment every day and not being able to avoid conversations, situations, e-mail messages, and people that remind you of getting psychologically tormented. Imagine having explored all alternative job possibilities but finding that there's nothing else that would be a good fit intellectually and economically. So you feel trapped and stuck. Some may say the solution is to just find another job.
I've never been physically abused. I've never been sexually abused. Despite being the hardest and most dedicated employee I've ever known, I've been emotionally bullied by peers and supervisors in work settings. With the use of lots of self-help tools, taking care of myself, using politically protective strategies, etc., I was feeling normal for a while, until two weeks ago.
In my current job for almost 10 years, I got an unjustified, undeserved, and trumped up written warning. The next 3 days were a total blur. I barely slept, I cried almost continuously. I got back to work, but yesterday, my heart pounded so fast and hard with trembling just while talking to one of the supervisors. Every time I make even the slightest mistake, I worry beyond belief that it will be magnified and used against me. It's so much pressure on myself that I'm exhausted.
I'm see a psychiatrist just for medication, and I am trying to find a psychotherapist. I'm here looking for some validation, support, and advice. Thanks.
I'm a social worker with a Master's degree.
I don’t think I have cataplexy. I used to experience sleep paralysis quite often(without hallucinations), but it’s never happened for the past few months.I doze off *at least* once(every class at most)every single day at school. I tried hitting myself, pinching, eating chocolate, drinking cold water while chewing strong mint gum, pulling on my hair and every other method I could think of, but...
I am having a hard time. I try to explain my mental illness to my boyfriend he doesnt get it. Im not suicidal right now but I just feel like theres no point. I wish I would just die. I have been sober for over 18 months and thats definitely helped but hasnt fixed it. I take Lamictal and Prozac. And still feel this way. I get manic (very breifly) and then I crash down into depression and cant get...