Imagine going to your place of employment every day and not being able to avoid conversations, situations, e-mail messages, and people that remind you of getting psychologically tormented. Imagine having explored all alternative job possibilities but finding that there's nothing else that would be a good fit intellectually and economically. So you feel trapped and stuck. Some may say the solution is to just find another job.
I've never been physically abused. I've never been sexually abused. Despite being the hardest and most dedicated employee I've ever known, I've been emotionally bullied by peers and supervisors in work settings. With the use of lots of self-help tools, taking care of myself, using politically protective strategies, etc., I was feeling normal for a while, until two weeks ago.
In my current job for almost 10 years, I got an unjustified, undeserved, and trumped up written warning. The next 3 days were a total blur. I barely slept, I cried almost continuously. I got back to work, but yesterday, my heart pounded so fast and hard with trembling just while talking to one of the supervisors. Every time I make even the slightest mistake, I worry beyond belief that it will be magnified and used against me. It's so much pressure on myself that I'm exhausted.
I'm see a psychiatrist just for medication, and I am trying to find a psychotherapist. I'm here looking for some validation, support, and advice. Thanks.
I'm a social worker with a Master's degree.
I honestly just shared details about my trauma for the very first time during a phone conference to a Better Help counselor. I told them about everything that happened. The sexual assault and how I had a miscarriage after, I was about to throw up by the end of the call. The questions to me were “ why did you drink?, why did you go there?, why weren’t you more aware of situation.” And...
From behind a locked door?They gave me a new deadbolt a few months ago....it is a good,sturdy lock.But i am still afraid,from behind it.i do not know what to do with this hyperviglance.i cannot relax.i cannot read again,which is such a sad thing for me....i have to watch stupid mindless tv shows-Outside is much worse,but i am growing more and more afraid even Inside....intense Anxiety.i need a...