My friend got me some books for my birthday. I decided to crack the first one open and read a bit before bed. Im trying to do more calming things before I go to sleep. Im hoping that will help.
Within the first 3 pages there was a scene of the main character--who is 6--playing a game called "choo-choo" with another boy her age. She's the tunnel and he's the train, which basically means he crawls under her legs and sticks his head up her skirt.
I don't know where the author was going with this--because it deeply bothered me, and I stopped reading-and the book series is supposed to be mystery/comedy, so I don't think it was leading anywhere horribly dark. But it felt like too much of a violation to me to keep reading.
I'm frustrated that I've been so sensitive to things lately. And I feel bad, but I want nothing to do with those books or that book series anymore. She bought me the 1st 4 books in the series. And I just want to throw them away....at the same time, I feel like maybe I should hang on to them. Because maybe I'll get to a point where it doesn't bother me. But I really don't want to. I even feel uncomfortable having them in my room. I want them out of my house so I don't have to think of those words on that page and the child that didn't understand or know better.
The child that didn't realize what was happening was wrong. Who was clueless and complacent in abuse....because she simply didn't understand. Didnt have the words. And because no one told her that this was wrong...they just assumed she knew.
Wtf. How can a paragraph in a book fuck me up so bad? Seriously. I dont like being so sensitive to everything...
And I know my friend meant well. She loves this series and wanted to share it with me. What am I supposed to say when she asks if I've read it, or what I think? "Sorry but the first 3 pages triggered me so I decided to throw all of them away?" How shitty is that?
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