Im sat here on the floor thinking what he hell is going on right now?
I was so suidial over xmas i tried committ suicide twice. Ending up in recus ect.
Now im sat here only 15 days on and i feel my mood rocketing up. Bouncey, feeling confident and excitied.
But i ask why excited? Because i too know this goes to a bad place too. I am hearing voices i heard last year at this time of year where i was told i was psychotic. I started putting bleach into my cuts ect. Because they ( the voices told me i had to) and here i am contemplating it again because if it happens to you twice it must be real?
Xmas boxing day was my huge anniversary. I only have 2 anniversarys even though there could be 1000s. I was with the man that caused my trauma. I came home that day and tried commit suicide.
But im here and im excited by the prospect of my mind. I feel good yet so extremely irritable and crazy. My heads floating. Everythings so colourful.
This seems to be a repetitive cycle kf this time of year. Im expecting very soon the craving for bad substances kick in very soon then i totally loose it for another 2 months till i go back to level.
Fuck fuck fuck.
i am in my usual depression they are very mild thanks to the lamictal i slept all day as usual but managed to force myself to do laundry no money spending at amazon so it is good for now but very restless and no walk today ate some it did not taste as good as usual bot manged to get it all down then felt sick to my stomach but feeling better now in for a long night i think but may sleep just took...
I was born and raised in NY as my husband was. We both moved away from home for various reasons (college, work) in our early 20’s. We ended up moving permanently to Nashville, TN in 2007. In 2015, I was able to convince my parents (which was very difficult) to move closer to us because I am close with my mom and I had 2 kids they wanted to live near.My husband, out of the blue, was called by a...